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Rules Proposal 23.8: The Thursday Lock Box |
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Ricky
Headbanger
3322 posts
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Posted - 9/4/2018 7:20:54 PM |
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Rules Proposal 23.8: The Thursday Lock Box
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Introduce a system where the Thursday night players can be eligible to be drafted AND started in Week 1. The basic requirements for such a system are i) you have to make that "start-or-not" decision *before* the Thursday game, and ii) no information whatsoever should be revealed to other owners either before or during the Draft.
So here is how it could work:
a) Anyone who wants to draft AND start a Thursday night player in Week 1 can participate. Nobody is required to participate. And if you want a Thursday night player and don't want to start them, you can simply draft them as normal.
b) If, using the process described herein, you are successful in drafting your player then you MUST start that player in Week 1.
c) If you don't use this process and just do a normal drafting of a Thursday night player, you can obviously still have that player but you CANNOT start that player in Week 1.
d) We have a Draft Lock Box. It's a real fucking box with a real fucking lock on it. It's a fucking lock box.
e) Anyone who wants to participate would need to put a SEALED ENVELOPE in that box before kickoff on Thursday night.
f) You can either snail mail it to my house, as long as it *arrives by Wednesday*, or you can bring it with you on Thursday if you are coming to the house that day. If we have to, we may be able to come up with some electronic way to do it, but this paper approach is not subject to electronic fraud. Plus, we have a fucking box.
g) What you would put in the envelope would be like the following: "Koo, Pick 6.1, Mason Crosby".
h) Using that fine example, Sean would be waiting for that 6.1 pick to roll around. When it arrives, he can triumphantly announce to the room that he geniously opted for the draft-and-start route with regard to Crosby. The Koo would be required to take Crosby in that slot and to also include him in their Week 1 starters.
i) If a team puts an envelope in the fucking lock box and then does not honor their pick, they get holy fucking hell rained down upon them. I have no idea what the consequences of that should be, but it should be terrible. Suggestions are welcome.
j) NO ONE SHALL SPEAK OF WHAT IS IN THE CONTENTS OF THE BOX. THE FUCKING BOX. IT SHALL BE THE BOX THAT SHALL NOT BE SPOKEN OF. To do so would jeopardize the purity of the Draft. And so we either need to a) have a penalty for speaking about the box, or b) encourage total lying about the box. I like b) because of its elegant simplicity. If people are lying about it all the time, it's not taboo and no one is going to believe anything anyone else says.
k) Limitations. Because this is a new idea, we should start with a limit of one (1) of these Draft-and-Start nominations per team. |
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Head of Scouting
Gjallarhorn player
529 posts
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Fu: 99.57 |
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Posted - 6/9/2019 10:48:42 PM |
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Let's talk about the lock box
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I'm kosher with all of the parameters up to
letter h) Using your fine example what happen if for some reason that placekickers start falling in the draft and a better placekicker is available at draft spot 6.1 and Robbie Gould could still be snached up at the same place? Also, Does Sean lose the option to trade away said pick?
letter i) does being too drunk to pick count the same as not honoring the pick
letter j) I'm totally on board with deception! |
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Posted - 6/11/2019 9:56:11 PM |
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Talkin' box
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1) I love me some fuckin lock box and intend to vote yes on basically any fuckin lock box proposal
2) May I propose that we institute some plan for the first year of the lock box that helps reduce the likelihood of someone skipping over their lock box bid? Like, forexample, everyone submitting an entry into the lock box submits that entry in a sealed envelope, and on the outside of that envelope writes their team name and draft round? Once the draft is underway the owner name and round are announced so that no one drafts a player in their lock box round? I know that announcing the draft rounds may provide a hint to other owners about the nature of the lock box submittal, but maybe that's better than someone submitting a name to the lock box then not selecting that player when they should've.
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Posted - 6/12/2019 11:22:08 AM |
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agreed
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| I talked to Keith about this Sunday. I like the idea of a fucking lock box, but want to take out any human error type situations that could possibly occur. We will all be having a couple pops those two days after all. |
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Posted - 6/12/2019 3:15:40 PM |
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Fucking lock box ceremony
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Hear me out. We did a mock lock box last year. We are geniuses. But the box is there and we saw owners use the box, etc. What if an “hour before” the draft, we have a wooden box with a lid that is pad locked. It has a tiny slot on the lid. This will take minutes. Every present owner goes in a room in house and drops or doesn’t drop a pick. The Boys is the North send an envelope. Or Keith brings them back. Even if they are blank. And are dropped in in their “30 seconds of heaven” in the room. As blotto as one can get, there is no way (even Kent) will pass out before The Pick. If someone passes out before their Fucking Lockbox pick...wait for it... they forfeit a coach all season.
That seems fair.
Just brainstorming out loud. |
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Posted - 6/12/2019 8:19:59 PM |
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No Coach continued
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It might seem steep (or not), but it seems the Coach Proposal rule proposal may pass. If you don't have a coach at all, it could determine more than one game. It has in the past. It's a consequence that would be placed that would never have to be enforced. Any owner will be too excited to dclare Fucking Lock Box Pick no matter how ham boned! I know how I felt last year in the mock. My pick still shit in his sock, but STILL! ...a successful LOCK BOX pick!
Oh! School is out! I will start working on my opus for the draft. Let's take it to the streets! |
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Posted - 6/13/2019 6:54:03 AM |
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cyber lockboxing
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While the fucking lockbox seems to be a solid and really innovative idea, there is that one potential weakness of submitting an envelope but forgetting to announce it at the perfect time in the draft. This may be especially so as the draft reaches the middle and later rounds.
I have an idea that has two components. While this overall plan would unfortunately get rid of the physical fucking lockbox and replace it with a virtual one, it would be idiot proof and result in a flawless execution.
PART ONE
I would add a form on this website to be able to submit players into the virtual fucking lockbox. This approach would guarantee easy access to everyone regardless of where they live, and it would be accessible all the way up to the Thursday kickoff.
PART TWO
I'll modify the CustomizedDrafts.com draft room to look at the virtual fucking lockbox in real time. The computer would simply automatically pick the player in the specified draft slot and not even give a choice to the owner.
While this is a little bit of work to implement, I think the payoff would be significant. It provides a true solution to the quirkiness of us doing a draft after the NFL season begins, and we'd benefit from this system for years to come. Every player in every Thursday night game forever would become relevant.
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Posted - 6/13/2019 4:21:46 PM |
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If cyber lock box is ok with the programmer, it's ok with me
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| Cyber lock box definitely eliminates human error so that's great. But if the cyber lock box becomes too onerous to program I'm sure we can make a physical lock box work. |
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Posted - 6/18/2019 6:13:32 PM |
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Cyberlock
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| Sounds cool! Spacey. |
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Posted - 6/30/2019 2:29:37 PM |
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23.8: The Thursday Lock Box officially passes!
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With nine total votes and seven Yes votes and no No votes, the Thursday Lock Box is official.
Cyber development is already underway and everyone will be able to control their fucking lock box players through their team homepages. The draft room will be modified to automatically look in the cyber fucking lock box before even allowing said owners to make a pick.
This should eliminate all human errors with the exception of trades. For the love of the flying spaghetti monster, do not make any trades for any players that you put in your lock box. If you put a player in your lock box and then you traded your pick away, the trade goes through (because we shouldn't penalize the other team and it may be too late to do so anyways) but the idiot who traded a lock box pick away will lose their next pick in the draft. Like, lose it entirely. So if you lock boxed a player in Round 3 and then traded that pick away then the trade goes through but you lose your Round 4 pick. The moral of the story is "Don't trade away a lock box player, you drunk fuck."
The lock box form will include the Round Number and the overall Pick Number (in case the team owns more than one pick in a round).
This is a huge improvement for the league and I am very excited about it because it opens up all Thursday night players for eternity, not just in 2019. And it has a lot of other really fun wrinkles. |
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Posted - 7/4/2019 11:35:48 AM |
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Lock Box Fucking Lock Box is officially integrated into the draft room
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Here is an example of it in action:
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Posted - 7/10/2019 10:05:10 PM |
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Fucking lock box fucking rules!
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This is so awesome. Biggest thanks to Keith for actually doing the work, but I think we all deserve some praise for figuring out a way to incorporate the NFL's garbage TNF kick-off game into the greatest fantasy league ever devised. Fuck you Goodell and long live Ragnarok!!!
Roving Gamblers of Asgard Division |
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Posted - 9/1/2019 12:42:16 PM |
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Rules Addendum 23.8: Fucking Injuries
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This rule is amended so that if a lock box player becomes injured during the opening Thursday night game, this player can be exempt from being drafted. The owner of the lockbox submission can decide whether or not they want to keep that injured player.
For the purposes of what "injured" means, anything not obvious will be voted on by the league and the owner of the lockbox submission cannot vote. |
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Coach Cowher Tomlin
Football Freak
997 posts
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Fu: 100.96 |
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Posted - 9/1/2019 9:52:52 PM |
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Another Fucking Lock Box question.
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| It says if you absentmindedly trade away your FLB pick away the trade goes through and you lose your next pick. Ok cool. But what if you deliberately trade your prospective FLB pick away in a totally devious way? I think this should totally be encouraged. |
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